 09:04:55 Ok! Today is going to be an intensive transit day! We need to get some day passes from the automated machines before we get onto the SkyTrain. I have a problem today. You see, tonight there is an Oasis concert here in Vancouver and for the past weeks and months I've been trying to decide whether or not to go. Over the past couple of days I sort of came to the conclusion that I wouldn't bother (despite the fact that I like them) and save some money. (I think I probably almost made this decision before I left Holland because I decided against putting any Oasis songs onto my iPod for the trip.) But then I started to think... maybe if the tickets aren't that much I'll just go. I can spare thirty or forty bucks, I guess. And, as luck would have it, just across the street from this particular SkyTrain station is GM Place stadium where Oasis is performing tonight, so let's pop over and see if there are any tickets, shall we? TIME PASSES Ok. Screw that. The tickets are like $70 and they aren't anywhere even close to the stage. How the hell can Oasis justify charging that much for tickets to their concert? That's insane! Plus, this is Canada. They aren't THAT popular here. That resolves it. I ain't going to see them tonight. Whew! That's one decision I can forget about now.  09:36:52 The first stop is the Waterfront Centre where there is a food court and I can have Subway for breakfast.  09:39:44 I like fountains.  10:12:06 Reversing course takes us all the way back across downtown to Main Street. This area was once all part of the Expo 86 World's Fair grounds. (Oh... the memories...)  10:15:35 Main Street is also home to Science World, which is itself also a remnant of Expo 86. (The big dome at the right.) Across the water are the condos of Yaletown.  10:16:05 Not only is the "Expo Dome" (IE Science World) a remnant of Expo 86, but the building across the water in front of BC Place Stadium (the big white roof) is also a former Expo 86 site, home of the Plaza of Nations and the British Columbia pavilion. It is now a Casino.  10:17:49 This is the third photo of the Expo Dome in a row... what exactly am I trying to accomplish? Unless I am just shamelessly trying to demonstrate that we once again have great weather.  10:18:37 Ah yes! Here comes our ride! The False Creek Ferry! This is how we're going to get to Granville Island.  You see, this whole stretch of water between the Expo Dome and Granville Island (where we are headed) is called False Creek. The name comes from the fact that it really seems like the inlet was created by a creek or river flowing into the ocean, but in fact no such thing exists.  10:18:54 Is it just me or does this kid seem a bit young to be driving a boat?  10:25:27 Off we go down False Creek toward Granville Island!  10:27:19 What we see here is the Plaza of Nations and former BC Pavilion from Expo. The row of flagpoles in the foreground has special meaning to me... Once, when I was a completely different person and magic things were possible I spun around those flagpoles, one after another, all the way to the end. Whatever happened to that magic?  10:31:19 Some people have too much money, don't you think?  10:32:47 The boat is really crowded today. I guess that's what we get for catching the first one of the entire day.  10:36:38 Closing in on Granville Island we pass by the floating houses that occupy it's Southern end.  10:43:51 Disembarking at Granville Island gives us a nice view across False Creek toward the Burrard Street Bridge. For those of you familiar with the KatKam webcam of Vancouver you will realise that the dude that runs it must be located in one of the tall buildings over there on the right, or maybe a bit out of the shot to the right. Check it out, it's a great webcam... www.katkam.ca  10:44:49 And with that we arrive at Granville Island and the Granville Island Public Market.  10:49:13 Lots of tasty stuff can be found at the market. Check out all these pastas!  10:50:40 Unbelievably perfect and huge boxes of every kind of berry you could ever want.  10:53:39 I realise that just yesterday I said that the Kiwi Pie Company had the best pies in the world, but these look pretty good too, actually.  10:56:37 This place on the right is a good place to get salmon. Just in case you're ever here and feel like salmon.  10:58:31  11:26:49 Granville Island lies just underneath of the Granville Street Bridge, as you can see in this photo.  11:39:16 After walking around a bit it's time for lunch. I decide to have some out of focus perogies and cabbage roll.  12:15:08 We're really skipping around a lot here, as you might have noticed. We've now taken another of these little ferries across to the other side of False Creek and are headed back up to Neil's neighbourhood in the West End to do some more shopping.  13:01:59 Skipping yet again brings us back to the heart of downtown and the Vancouver Art Gallery. People are always hanging around on the steps of the Art Gallery. I guess it's like the cool thing to do.  13:22:18 Shopping isn't always the most exciting pastime for males, but fortunately for me shoe stores always have a place to sit down. So... there I am, standing outside of a shoe store in Pacific Centre Mall in downtown Vancouver when Liam Gallagher (lead singer of Oasis) walks right past me. "No," I say to myself. "That didn't just happen. Liam Gallagher didn't just walk past me. No way." It had to be someone who just really looks like him, right? But I am not convinced. I once hung out with Oasis at Abbey Road Studios and showed them card tricks. I have a pretty good idea of what Liam looks like from up close and I really think that was him. "Liam" walks a short way through the mall and ducks into the Club Monaco store. I follow him inside and browse through the store while he picks out a couple of hats (you know, those fisherman kind of hats that are kind of trendy... he picks out one dark blue and one green one). Another close look for me and that is definitely Liam Gallagher. I walk outside the store again and he goes to pay for his hats.  13:22:32 This has to be a sign or something. Fate must really think that I should go to this concert tonight. I mean... really... what are the odds? Fair enough then. I'll go to the concert.  13:22:56 At the risk of officially becoming a stalker I take one last photo (from the hip) as Liam passes by me as he comes out of the store. He continues down the mall, looking over his shoulder quite repeatedly as if he's checking to see if anyone's following him or noticing him. I wonder if he's wondering why no one recognises him. Or maybe he's mad that no one does recognise him. This isn't England, after all, where probably a lot of people would. On the other hand, as I know from experience, he's not the skinny little runt that he looks like in videos and on television. He's actually a fair sized dude and that's actually one of the factors that I recognised when he walked right past me a few minutes ago. "You should have gone up and talked to him," several people later say. "Maybe showed him some card tricks." Yah, well. I doubt he'd remember anyway. Plus, he was kind of a jerk. I quote from my own official account of the encounter, taken from my book (Yay! I didn't think I'd be able to quote my book AGAIN this year! But don't worry, I cleaned it up this chapter from the draft version, which, if I may say so myself, was absolutely terrible): Chapter 10 - Champagne SupernovaI had this crazy idea to do some sessions for my latest album at Abbey Road Studios. I say "crazy idea" because I lived in Canada at the time, worked at McDonalds and was an absolute nobody. But never one to let stupid and crazy ideas pass me by a few months later I found myself on the opposite side of the world sharing the same complex of offices and recording studios with one of the biggest bands in the world at the time - Oasis. They in Abbey Road's Studio Two and myself in Studio Three. I actually hadn't heard of Oasis until a few weeks earlier when a friend of mine loaned me a copy of their What's The Story Morning Glory album. He had heard them say on television that they were going to be going to Abbey Road and he was hoping that I might run into them so he gave me his CD to get autographed. I took the CD home and listened to it and realised immediately that I knew the song Wonderwall from hearing it on the radio, but I still had no idea who the band was or that it was actually basically two brothers (one of whom wrote all the songs) that a lot of people saw as ill-behaved egotistical untalented Beatles wannabes. Maybe that was for the best for me because I didn't have that view of them as personalities to taint things. For me, I just liked the music a lot and went to buy my own copy of the CD the very next day. Two months later they would be working on their new album in a recording studio just down the hallway from my own. Now, it should be noted that "just down the hallway" might as well be on a completely different planet so forget any visions you might have of me and Oasis all sitting around together channelling the ghost of John Lennon and playing Give Peace a Chance. As recording studios tend to be, the studios at Abbey Road are fairly self-contained and isolated and you can pretty much be a recluse and stay locked inside the entire day. Studio Three even has a nice private lounge overlooking it, complete with a fridge that they apparently don't always clean out because it still had left-over Caesar Salad stuff from when Robbie Williams was there the week before. But, of course in the cafeteria at Abbey Road you can run into just about anyone (I missed Paul McCartney earlier on this particular day, for example) and by dinner time Oasis and a few of their roadies had gathered at two corner tables directly beside where my girlfriend was sitting. Liam Gallagher was looking a big haggard with unruly hair and a few days growth of a beard. He was sitting in between two gorgeous girls who never spoke, one of whom was constantly leaning over to touch him on his shoulder. It was not easy to tell the difference between the roadies and the other more generic band members but Noel Gallagher was clearly recognisable. He was wearing a big jacket which was zipped up to the neck and I remember thinking that he looked as though he was freezing and it really wasn't that cold. The band and their hangers-on were all talking amongst themselves and listlessly picking at big plates of chilli and rice. (Chilli and rice? I thought. That's weird... but it was the lunch special that day. I later learned that Chilli with rice was kind of a normal European thing. It's the rice part that is weird, by the way.) No one seemed to be that thrilled about the Chilli, except for Noel who was quietly eyeing the boisterous group beside him while enthusiastically shovelling food into his mouth. I was looking for my girlfriend. “Did you see where that chick went?” I asked Noel, pointing toward my girlfriend's abandoned pens and magazines on the table next to him. “Maybe she went looking for your shoes,” he suggested, looking down at my socked feet. (I had taken my shoes off, you see, and was walking around everywhere in my socks.) Ah. Helpful. Thanks. My girlfriend finally returned and we sat down together at our table. Next to us Noel noisily finished scraping clean his plate of rice and went up to get seconds. The rest of the group had hardly touched theirs at all. “That's the lead singer right?” My girlfriend asked, leaning over the table and discretely gesturing toward Liam. “Yes.” “He’s a jackass,” she said. She'd been sitting there for most of the day while I was working upstairs. “All he does is pick on someone until everyone else starts making fun of them. He then gets bored and decides to pick on someone else." "I see." "And they’ve been offering me drinks and bumming smokes ever since they got here,” she complained. “You’d think they could afford their own cigarettes.” I laughed. While we were talking I was restlessly shuffling and fooling around with a deck of cards. I always carried a trick deck with me everywhere I went just in case I needed an icebreaker to instigate conversations with cute chicks or famous rock stars. “What are you doing over there?” one of the group next to us asked, pointing to the cards with a cigarette. “Playing Blackjack?” I looked over. “Card tricks,” I replied. "Wanna see a card trick?” “Yeah, sure, yeah.” The entire group echoed enthusiastically around the table. “No!” Liam said emphatically. I looked back and forth between him and the rest of the group. He was out-voted, but he was the lead singer. Did that mean he had final veto on strangers coming over to do card tricks? How exactly did that work? The group was silent for a second as they looked over at Liam. Maybe they were thinking the same thing that I was. “Don’t listen to him!” they said finally. “Come on over.” They pulled up a vacant chair to their table and made room for me at the circular table next to one of the girls with Liam. The girl on the opposite side looked very familiar and it took me a moment to think of who she reminded me of. She kind of looked like the girl from Lethal Weapon II. Kind of, but not entirely. This chick had longer hair and seemed a lot taller. But come to think of it, whatever happened to her anyway? She was pretty awesome, I thought to myself. A few months later Liam would get married to the actress Patsy Kensit, thus confirming that the girl next to him at that moment didn't just "kind of look like" the girl from Lethal Weapon II, she actually WAS the girl from Lethal Weapon II. She'd just grown her hair longer, as people do. The chicks were pretty awesome, but not wanting to offend anyone I didn't check them out too much as I sat down to show Oasis one of my best card tricks. “Ok.” I said, shuffling the cards a bit. “Who wants to pick a card?” “Me.” Liam said forcefully. “I will.” Apparently he had changed his mind about wanting to see the card trick. I fanned out the cards for him. “Pick any card you want.” He pulled a card from the spread out deck and quickly yanked it in close to his body so that I, nor anyone else, could see it. “Now show the card to everyone else so they know what it is." “No,” he replied. Ok. Don’t show it to anyone, I thought. “Ummmm. All right.” I replied slowly, fanning the cards out for him again. “Just put it back anywhere in the deck.” As he was holding the card he was crumpling and bending the hell out of it. I was thinking that even if this wasn't a card trick I (or anyone) would still be able to identify which card he had since the deck was brand and he was bending it so much. He slipped the card back into the deck and I proceeded to shuffled it a few times. “Ok.” I said placing the stack of cards face down on the table in front of him. “Now cut the deck.” After cutting the cards he abruptly decided to snatch the entire deck up off the table and proceeded to violently shuffle the cards. I was worried for a moment. That wasn’t part of the trick. He wasn't supposed to grab the cards like that. He continued to rearrange the deck thoroughly but the way in which he was shuffling and randomising the cards allowed me to relax. It was a trick deck, like I said, and as long as he didn’t split the deck in two parts and ruffle it together in the wrong way I would still be able to perform the trick. Apparently he, like me, didn’t know how to do that very well because he continued shuffling hand over hand. I must admit that he did a very effective job of randomising the cards by shuffling them for nearly two minutes. He even resorted to shuffling underneath the table out of my view. Finally he was satisfied that he'd completely screwed up the card trick and returned the deck to the top of the table. Looking at the cards I couldn’t believe my luck. If he had shuffled them in just a slightly different way it would have ruined everything and I would look like a big loser. But after doing his best to ruin the trick the critical "trick" factor remained intact and his efforts were only going to serve to strengthen the illusion because at this no one thought that I’d ever be able to find that card now. Without a word I picked up the cards again and looked around the table as I casually shuffled the deck a few more times, surreptitiously moving the chosen card to the top. It was time for the final bit of showmanship. “Is this your card?” I asked while dropping the entire deck face down on the table. As the deck fell the top card flipped over in mid-air and fell nearly perfectly onto the top of the stack. The king of diamonds.  NOTE: This is the exact same deck of cards that I used to show the card trick to Liam Patsy Kensit blinked hard and straightened up slightly as she realised that the top card had somehow flipped over in mid-air and that it was, in fact, the card Liam had originally picked. She was sitting right next to him and was probably the only other one who actually saw it. “That’s not it.” Liam said calmly, shattering my utter glee at having come so unbelievably close to absolute crushing card-trick failure only to be handed a gift from the gods of putting egotistical rock stars in their place. “What?” I responded in surprise, looking down at the face up card. Did I screw the trick up? No. I didn't. That WAS his card. I could clearly see that it was bent in relation to the rest of the deck, the unexpected result of Liam’s rough handling. “It is so!” I said, but Liam had still succeeded in denying me my "in your face rock star boy!" moment. I looked up again to see the rest of the group subtly rolling their eyes at Liam and I felt a bit vindicated. “Do it again,” one of them said. “Ok.” I complied, breaking a cardinal rule of card tricks - the first rule of magic being to never perform the same trick twice in a row. But me being a complete hack and not a real magician at all I can do whatever I want. And besides, I wanted to prove that I didn’t screw it up the first time. So I went through the motions of the trick again. I let someone else pick a card this time and then cut and shuffle the deck as much as they wanted to. I took back the cards and ended the trick in the same overly dramatic way as before. I dropped the deck down to the table with a flourish and the top card flipped over in mid-air to reveal itself as the selected card, one of the jokers ironically. A stunned silence followed. A couple of them literally dropped their mouths open. Of course, I'm not some great card magician or anything, but I do have a couple of good tricks up my sleeve that I used to strike up conversations with girls and this was definitely the best one. In honesty it is an amazingly effective trick and I know that if I myself saw it I would be stunned into silence as I tried to figure out how it was done. “Do it again,” they demanded. “How about a different one?” I replied. They agreed so I shuffled the cards casually a few times before placing the deck on the table again. Turning away from Liam I asked one of them to split the deck into three different piles. Placing my finger on top of the first pile I announced the name of the card that was underneath. I then picked the card up and proceeded to do the same thing for the next pile. After predicting the top card of all three stacks I laid down the cards I had picked up. They were the exact cards that I had said they were. “How'd you do that?” they said, employing various profane expressions I was unfamiliar with. Liam had remained silent throughout all this. I could sense a lack of enthusiasm. “That’s a secret.” I replied. I performed a few more tricks before finally putting the cards away. When rubbing shoulders with rock stars you don't want to do too many card tricks, you see. That's the cardinal rule of meeting famous people. “Do you want a drink?” Liam asked me as he waved over to the bar for another round for himself. He had gradually become less stand-offish as we'd all sat together talking for a while. “No, thank you," I answered politely. “I don’t drink.” A new round of drinks was brought around by the bartender and I noticed that at some point while we were chatting Noel had disappeared, presumably back into Studio Number Two to actually do some work. A while later Oasis’s producer peeked his head around the corner from the hallway to get Liam’s attention. “Do you need me for vocals?” Liam asked, pointing to himself. The man nodded and Liam stood up and went back to work. The two girls who were with him stayed behind but continued to sit there without saying a word. It was kind of weird, actually, because I think maybe they might have whispered quietly amongst themselves and Liam, but I hadn’t heard either of them actually say anything out loud. At the time I didn't think too much of it since I figured they were just some groupie chicks or something, but one of them was a movie star of sorts so it's kind of weird that she was so reserved and timid. With the lead singer and band members gone the mood changed completely. He hadn't said much and preferred to brood quietly (it's called being stoned... not that that's a bad thing) but after he left the atmosphere was considerably more friendly and, in a way, more normal. I started to think about getting back up to Studio Three and back to work myself. All the important famous people were gone, after all, but we were having a nice chat so I stuck around. They were very interested in what I was working on. I tried to explain to them that I was a complete nobody that they'd never heard of and that I was there working on an independent kind of thing but they didn’t seem to understand that. “So what’s your band called?” they asked me. “Well, it doesn’t really have a name. Not yet anyway.” “But you have had a single out or something right?” “No.” I replied. “You'd never have heard of me before." “Back in Canada then?” “No. Not really. I’m here doing some tracks for my new record.” I shrugged and they didn't really get it. “What recording room are you in?” They asked. “Number three.” “Can we come up later on and take a look?” “Sure," I said. “It has a nice private lounge you can hang out in, actually. Help yourselves.” “Cheers,” they replied. After talking for a while longer I finally excused myself and told them that I should get back upstairs to get to work. They said they’d be up later on and I went out through the garden to head back upstairs. That was pretty surreal, I thought, and went out to the front steps to finish my juice. Sitting there in the approaching twilight I felt as though I was perched on the border between two very different worlds. On the street in front of the studio there were small congregations of Oasis fans gathered. Any one of them, I am sure, would have been thrilled to have been in my shoes for the past couple of hours. But instead of them it was me there on the inside, feeling somehow as though I didn't really belong there.  I am often asked whether I took any pictures or got any autographs signed by Oasis when I was there with them. My response is simply... No! Of course not! What am I? Some desperate fan? I was there to make a record, same as they were. The only difference is that ultimately their record sold a lot more copies than mine did. I met them as an equals... or as equal as one can be considering that they are famous millionaire rock stars and I am not. But as luck would have it... Oasis actually did have several official photographs taken of them during their sessions at Abbey Road that October. And as luck would further have it one of those photos was actually taken on the same day I hung out with them (believe it or not). This artsy black and white photo from Abbey Road Studios was either taken on exactly the same day that I hung out with them, or they are all wearing EXACTLY the same clothes as they were when I saw them. And this isn't a case of modifying memories to match the picture. I specifically remember Liam's haircut and leather jacket, as seen in this photo, and don't forget what I wrote earlier about Noel's big jacket being zipped up all the way to the top (which I wrote BEFORE I ever saw this photo, I might add). It's funny to think about the fact that Oasis was there at Abbey Road Studios for precisely the same reason that I was there, and I don't mean simply to record music, but rather because The Beatles used to record there. Yes, it's a great world-class studio, and yes I needed a studio with a piano, but there are many great world-class studios in the world with pianos. There is, however, only one Abbey Road and whether you're a famous rock star or a loser like me we both hope to experience and somehow feel a bit of the magic that fills the place. We go there to play and sing in the same rooms where The Beatles spent nearly their entire recording career, and, for me, also important was that it is where Pink Floyd spent a fair bit of their recording careers as well. Abbey Road is one of those studios where you don't really have to list all the artists that have recorded there because basically everyone who is anyone has. From Sting to Liam and Noel Gallagher to Shakira to me... everyone likes to sit around Studio Two playing Beatles songs. It's just what you do when you're there, as tacky as it sounds (and feels at the time). For a classic photo or two of some of my band doing exactly this please feel free to consult the travelogue from one of my later sessions at Abbey Road:  Even though I didn't take any pictures with Oasis, I still have a few pictures of my own from that particular Abbey Road session that I will now share with you. This is me playing piano for some of the tracks on my Radio Free Earth album. A good example of this piano playing from this particular session is in the song The Post War Dream. Use the link below to access the lyrics page from the album website and download the song, if you're interested.  The control room of Studio Three at Abbey Road with my ADAT machines and tapes at the left. I had no end of trouble with the ADAT format and cursed them many times during the recording process, but I was "stuck" with them because I'd started the sessions for this particular record off in Canada using ADAT and chose to stick it out with that format until I got to the mixing phase, at which point I mixed the whole record using ProTools and Session8.  This is the main room of Studio Three with the walkway and private lounge visible at the top of the photo. As I mentioned earlier, Robbie Williams was there the week before and left some salad ingredients in the fridge.  And finally my own artsy black and white photo from Abbey Road. Not as cool as Oasis's, is it? Again, for a good example of my Abbey Road guitar playing (not to mention Abbey Road tambourine playing and singing, including my own backing vocals) please use the link below to access the lyrics page from the Radio Free Earth website and download the song.  And what about that girl that was sitting with Liam that day so long ago? Patsy Kensit. Here you see her in a scene from Lethal Weapon II I would have to say that most guys remember her very well because she was really awesome and got naked in the movie. Ask any adult male that you know and see if he remembers the chick from Lethal Weapon II that was Mel Gibson's South African love interest. He will, I assure you. In retrospect maybe I should have been chatting HER up instead of the rest of them? (In an odd twist of irony, years later I would be at another recording studio in Holland doing some sessions just down the hall from Simple Minds. In the bar of the studio complex I would brush past Jim Kerr, the lead singer... and Patsy Kensit's first husband.)  17:30:19 Liam melts into the crowd and takes the escalator at the left to the upper level and disappears (presumably) back into the Four Seasons Hotel just above which has an entrance connected directly to Pacific Centre. I guess that's where they're staying, huh? It was so strange to see him like that, just happening by sheer unbelievable coincidence to walk right past me in a crowded downtown Vancouver shopping centre. The last time I was that close to Liam Gallagher was many years on the other side of the world. I remember that a couple of weeks after hanging out with them at Abbey Road Liam was arrested for possession of cocaine and I remember feeling back then a sort of half-serious pang of regret for not having spent the entire night hanging out with Liam and Oasis and maybe getting arrested too? (Canadian Man Arrested in London After Drug-Induced Plunge from Roof of Famous Beatles Recording Studio). The opportunity had certainly been there, but by the time I finished working I was pretty tired, and my girlfriend was there with me (who was still mad at Liam for being a jackass and borrowing cigarettes), and I don't drink alcohol anyway so what was the point, and [insert more lame excuses here]. So I just went home at like ten o'clock and went to bed. Now THAT's Rock and Roll baby! Whoo! In all honesty though, I wish that I had at the very least taken a guitar into the cafeteria when we were all eating dinner and sat down and started playing Wonderwall. I wish I'd done this not because I have some fantasy that then we all would have jammed together and then they'd say "join our band" and then I'd be famous and [insert more lame fantasy here], but because to this day it bugs me that I didn't get to find out what Liam and Noel's reaction to that would have been. Prediction: It wouldn't have been very nice but would have been funny as hell when I told people later. Hmmmmm. Maybe I SHOULD have gone and talked to him here today in the shopping mall after all. I didn't really see the point of doing so at the time, but maybe it would have made for a good story later when he told me that he didn't "fucking remember no fucking card tricks, so fuck off". At the very least it might have made him feel better to know that at least one person in Pacific Centre recognised who he was... because no one else did.  17:30:19 So... bumping into Liam like that basically made the decision for me of whether or not I was going to the concert. I'm going. A visit to one of those "legal" scalper dudes who sell tickets from a store rather than off the street and I am considerably less wealthy but in possession of a ticket to tonight's concert. Now all I have to do is kill a bit of time downtown before jumping on the SkyTrain and heading for GM Place.  18:16:46 What better place to kill time than in a nice comfy chair in Starbucks?  And how good is my ticket to see Oasis? (You ask) Pretty good, I think. Front row. Look at the face value of this ticket.... $68.25!!! I had wondered earlier in the day how Oasis could justify charging $70 for a concert ticket... I guess one way to do that is to have two opening bands. Personally I would prefer not to sit through two opening bands, save a bit of cash, and just get straight to the band I came to see. Maybe that's just me. Even so, $70 is still too much for a band like Oasis to be charging. They end up pocketing most of it because they don't really spend much on putting on an extensive stage and lighting show. But maybe we'll get lucky with the opening bands? We got lucky last year with Sarah McLachlan's opening act, Butterfly Boucher. I consider discovering her to be one of the highlights of last year's entire trip to Canada. Maybe Oasis's opening acts will be really mind-blowing like she was?  19:20:25 And so I finally arrive at GM Place for the Oasis concert. On the way in I don't even bother with stuffing my camera into my pants to sneak it in because, I mean, get real... in this age of cell phone cameras aren't we past this whole stupid "No Cameras / No Audio" thing? Apparently not. They search my bag and upon finding my camera they force me to leave it outside with the coat check people. Oh give me a break. Fine. Take my bag and camera then. But where do I pick up my bag after the concert? (I ask the dude) At section 111. (He replies) Where's that? (I ask) It's right over there. (He answers, pointing to the big obvious sign that says "111") Ok. Thank you. (I say) Enjoy the concert. (He says) Thank you very much. And might I also thank you very much for pointing the sign out for me because when you turned your head to do so I pulled my camera out of my bag and slipped it into my pocket in a single quick fluid motion with all the skill of a seasoned magician palming a card. Have fun guarding my empty bag during the concert, Mr Predictable. The first of the two opening acts is a band called Kasabian. I am assured by all those around me that they will be really awesome. They weren't. Not really anyway. They were all right, but hardly what I would describe to a complete stranger as something really exceptional. If I had to sum up my experience of seeing them I think I would instead say something more like "they were an opening band". And that pretty much sums it up, I think.  19:48:58 At least some of the people here in the first couple of rows are paying attention though. That's something, I guess.  20:22:13 The second of Oasis's two opening acts was a band I'd actually heard of called Jet. I'd not only heard of them but I'd actually heard one of their songs before, which is to say that I'd actually heard most of their songs before since they were all kind of the same.  20:28:08 Jet was apparently a draw for a number of people in the audience because the place filled up considerably for their set and lots of people knew quite a number of their songs. They were also kind of interesting because on some of the songs the drummer would sing the lead vocals. I think I liked it better when he was singing because when the other guy was singing the songs even sounded more alike. In fact, the one song by Jet that I'd actually heard before was one of the songs with the drummer doing the singing. But where have I heard that song before?!? I don't listen to the radio much and I can't have heard it there anyway because I actually REALLY know the song well. I knew it well enough to actually know all the words. How is that possible?!?? I've barely heard of these guys before. Thinking..... thinking.... Oh wait. I've got it! I know where I know the song from! It's one of the annoying menu tunes from the NHL 2004 game. It's one of the songs that usually try to skip over when it comes on. I'm glad I figured that one out. That would have bothered me all year.  20:46:44 So, this year's opening acts here in GM Place were a bit of a disappointment. Almost exactly one year ago I first encountered Butterfly Boucher in this very same building just on the other side of the floor. She failed to impress anyone else I know, but to me she was really amazing so Kasabian and Jet were being judged on a very tough grading scale. But most everyone else seemed to enjoy them, so they hardly need me like them. Just look how full the place for Jet. Hey! Wait a minute.... something's weird here. This arena seems to small. IT IS too small!!! Oasis has the stage set up MUCH further out toward the audience than is normal. It's almost two sections further in than normal, in fact. No wonder it seems so crowded in here.  20:52:16 Ok, now we're finally getting to what I came to see. The lighting dudes are climbing up onto the scaffolding now. Oasis will be underway soon.  21:21:27 And so, three hours after arriving Oasis finally is ready to take the stage. And thanks a lot for putting "Oasis and guests" on the tickets so I'd know to come late and not have to stand here for three hours. (That was sarcasm, by the way.)  21:22:05 I wonder if Liam will be wearing one of his new Club Monaco hats? No. He's not. Maybe he just bought them to wear so that people wouldn't recognise him. He probably could have saved the money, I think.  21:22:14 If Oasis were a lot cooler band this would be a really cool picture.  21:23:34 Not that I want to slag on Oasis... I really like them. But I think even some of their most die-hard fans might agree that they aren't as cool as they think they are.  21:36:20 Then again... maybe that's not an accurate statement. What the hell is going on? In my life I've often wondered if I am the only person in Canada who actually likes Oasis. I am certainly a bigger fan than anyone that I know, and most people I know actively dislike them. But here in Vancouver the crowd is going crazy for them. And they aren't even really doing anything.  21:41:27 People in the crowd know all the words for songs I've never even heard before because they come off albums that weren't good enough for me to even bother downloading for free off the Internet.  21:45:21 This is really strange... the last time Oasis was in Vancouver (which was ten years ago, I might add, when they were a lot more popular in the world than they are now) they got pissed off and walked off stage because people were throwing shoes and coins at them. Tonight, however, not only is no one throwing anything at them but the almost the entire audience is on their feet (even those people way in the second tier at the back). I quote a review of Vancouver's last Oasis concert from www.iol.ie/~kglennon/tour/vancou.htm : Vancouver, BC, Canada -- 11/04/96 Well folks, I just returned from the Oasis concert in Vancouver, BC, Canada, and since I had full intentions of posting a review to the newsgroup, I"m here - and I have a pretty good story to tell! Well, I can't believe this happened, but I got there late. I walked in near the end of one song, and I couldn't really hear it, so I can't say what it was. But from afar, it was so amazing to see Liam & Co. in person! So I found my seat, almost directly to the left of the stage, about 100 feet away. After whatever song they played (there may have been 2 before I got there - I'm not sure yet), they launched into "Hello" and it was awesome. Liam's funky moves on stage were great! During the song, someone tossed a shoe on stage, in between the Gallager (spelling?) brothers, and so once the song was over, Liam, obviously pissed, told the crowd they better not fuckin' do that again, or that's it, they'll leave. Then Noel did his bit and basically said the same thing - "it's your choice". He apparently had seen who had thrown the show, pointed to him, and said, "You fucker, you're out of here" Then they played "Supersonic" - great great song - and, of course, someone tossed a hat on stage. Liam just looked down at it and kicked it away. Then someone threw an orange ball on stage and Liam played a couple seconds of soccer with the bass player. During the non-vocal parts of the stage, Liam stood right at the front of the stage, as if taunting the crowd to fuck with him. He also signaled the sound engineers with the middle finger salute to turn the sound down, which I found funny! :) Then they played "Roll With It", and, much to my non-surprise, some wise ass threw a shoe on stage - not just a sneaker, but a heavy duty clog shoe. It was right near the end of the song, Liam just looked to his left an Noel, pointed to it, shook his head, they finished what was left of the song, and then Liam (or was it Noel? Can't remember..) said, "Ok, we warned you, that's it, good-nite" (or something to that effect) and the whole band left the stage. Everyone started booing (which I laughed at - great way to get them back on shitheads) and then Liam, smoke in hand, stormed back on stage, went to the mike, and said something along these lines - "You shouldn't be throwing shoes at us, we're not a bunch of fucking monkeys, we're the best band in the world!" and then left. I was just laughing, as I found this all so funny. Here was the fiesty Gallager brothers in action! Everyone started booing and shit, and after about 20 minutes people were yelling and shit, and a few weak attempts at cheering were made. I was watching the back of the stage area, where the band had left from, and at one point I saw five shadowed figures standing there, but they soon disappeared again. Soon after this, some roadie picked up a mike and said, "Due to a small portion of the audience, Oasis will not be coming back. The concert is over and you can get refunds at your point of purchase on Monday". The crowd got pissed, booed, and I was still laughing. So, that was the great Oasis show. I think it was a great concert - I got to see three songs! - but I'm kinda disappointed that I didn't get to see the whole set. But I'm not pissed whatsoever at the band - I can totally understand why they did what they did - it was a shitty situation all around. It's too bad that because of 2 fucking shitheads in the crowd, everyone missed out.. but hey, I"m happy - I've seen Oasis live now! :) Cheers, Darkseid  21:58:03 Did that guy I just quoted say something about Liam's "funky moves" onstage? What the hell is he talking about? From all the footage I've seen of concerts Liam Gallagher is the most wooden on-stage personality I've ever seen in my life.  21:58:06 Or maybe you just have to see Liam in the flesh to really appreciate his "funky moves"? Well, newsflash... you don't. Because he's even more wooden in person than on film. Here you see Liam standing off to the side of the stage during a part of the song where there's no singing. And so he stands there like a pet rock.... without moving... literally without moving... for thirty seconds. Yah.... funky! Go Liam! Stand there! Don't move! Good boy!  22:00:19 One thing that is "interesting" (that is to say unique) about Liam's on-stage demeanour is the way he tilts his head up into the microphone and pushes the whole mic stand away from him with his lips.  22:09:16 One thing that is NOT interesting about Liam's on stage demeanour is the way he stands there like a statue so often when he doesn't have to sing. Now, me being who I am I am sympathetic to the lead singer role where the person doesn't play an instrument. It's tough to know what to do with yourself during guitar solos and stuff like that. Some walk off stage completely. Others, yes, just stand there. In Liam's defence the worst thing to do is to do some cheesy air-guitar moves and stuff like that, so at least he's not doing that. But the good performers... the GREAT performers... interact with the audience. If I may use a recent example from my own concert experiences this year: Robbie Williams. Watch what Robbie does either while he's singing or when he's not. Or Bono, for that matter. These are frontmen who know how to work an audience. Of course it does help your ability and inclination to be animated on stage if the audience worships you. But, contrary to my expectations that is exactly what the audience here tonight does. So why are you just standing there Liam?!??  22:26:36 What?!??? Where the hell are you guys going? You've only been playing for an hour! (Of course it's just one of those "encore" things, but still.... they've only been on stage an hour!)  22:30:28 Liam shows us some more of his "funky moves". Do you know what else is kind of annoying about Oasis in concert? It's the way that they just play everything really loud and distorted. Of course I have nothing against loud rock music, but Wonderwall isn't a loud rock song, and yet they often play it completely electric and loud and distorted. There are no quiet bits in an Oasis concert. Quiet bits run the risk of being boring, yes.... but I think Wonderwall played acoustic would be okay, don't you think? It's their biggest hit!  22:46:19 Fortunately I don't have to take a movie to capture the excitement of Liam on stage because he doesn't move from this position for the next minute and a half. And if you think I am just being sarcastic when I say this.... please know that despite my sarcasm when I say that he literally does not move from these "poses" I literally mean that he actually does not move. He stands there, just like this, for uncomfortably long periods of time.  22:47:48 So less than 90 minutes after Oasis first takes the stage the concert is over. Noel, who hasn't said much all night (and yet has moved around more than his brother) takes the last few moments to interact with the audience. This is one thing I like about Oasis, I must say. I notice that when they toss a guitar pick or a tambourine (yes, they throw tambourines... two of them on this particular night) into the audience that they will stand there and make sure that whomever it was they were trying to throw it to actually GETS the thing. Both Liam and Noel took stand there and say "Give it to them, yah them" (pointing to the right person). Now, I don't know if this was because they were trying to throw it to some hot chick and some doofus grabbed it instead, or whether they are tossing stuff to just any dedicated fan (whether or not they are a hot chick or not) but it's still a nice thing to do, I think.  22:47:59 Noel reads a note that someone has handed him from the audience and then walks off stage.  22:48:03 For those who are interested I include tonight's setlist with comments from me, a guy who is a big enough fan to pay for any good Oasis's albums and who looks forward to any new records that they put out: Turn Up the Sun (never heard of this song before) Lyla (a song I thought so mediocre I wouldn't even download it for free) Bring it on Down (another song I wouldn't even download for free) Morning Glory (best song of the entire concert) Cigarettes and Alcohol (a classic tune from their debut album) The Importance of Being Idle (never heard of it, but Liam takes it to heart, apparently) A Bell Will Ring (this song doesn't ring a bell with me... I don't think I've ever heard of it) Acquiesce (one of the best Oasis songs ever, but ironically never released on a proper studio album) Live Forever (another Oasis classic) Mucky Fingers (never heard of it) Wonderwall (the obligatory big hit) Champagne Supernova (another song from the "glory" days) Rock and Roll Star (another classic from the first album ENCORES Guess God Thinks I'm Abel (never heard of it) The Meaning of Soul (never heard of it) Don't Look Back in Anger (second best song of the concert) My Generation (I've heard of it, but it's not an Oasis song anyway, and they didn't do a very good cover of it) Conspicuously missing from the set is the song Supersonic. For some reason Oasis chooses to play a heavy dose of their newer and far less impressive material rather than crowd favourites. Liam also, oddly, dedicates the song Live Forever to all the people in New Orleans. I am sure they appreciate it.  22:48:07 And so the concert ends. I am not sure how I feel. I lack that concert "high" that you get after a really great show. I suppose that's not surprising since it wasn't really a great show, and to make matters worse they played a lot of songs that I don't even know (and wouldn't like if I did). Considering that I am a fan of Oasis and have more than half of their albums (all the early ones) I really didn't get to hear many songs that I like during the course of the short concert. But maybe that's just me... because everyone else around me was totally crazy about the whole show. I started to wonder if they and I were even watching the same concert. I mean, it wasn't that great kids.... but apparently Oasis is really really great if you're really really stoned, I guess. Check out some of the reviews by Oasis fans from the band's website (www.oasisinet.com): "With all the concerts and show's I've been to, I can say this was one of the best I've seen. For me, my favorite points were Live Forever and Rock N Roll Star." "best concert ever seen. i think they were great and noel is better looking in person than any other photo. just to let you know noel. " "the crowd was a little stiff. Show rocked but like when they were singing 'need a little time to WAKE UP'...I was like ya!!! wake the #### up!!! . People were singing but nobody was really moving much . I imagine seeing them in Britain is even better. " "I thought the Oasis show last night was really good...Oasis did a great job and rocked the house...I especially liked a lot of the new stuff and pretty much everything off Morning Glory. I have to say one thing...Liam is one cocky little ####, and I could see why you would want to throw a shoe at him! " "Personally I dont care what anyone else thinks, Sept 8 was the best night of my life. " "holy frickin amazing. best show ever. cheers to the two irish guys in the row behind me for being mad fer it. " "AMAZING, JUST AMAZING! " "Near the end of the show Liam was standing looking in my general direction with his cocky pose, so I was sure to flip him a few two finger wanker salutes in his direction. I swear his gaze deviated in my direction with a scowl of discontent....and didn't avert it for what seemed like a full 30 seconds. It was all good though" See what I mean?!?? What's with these people?!?? And this guy says he stood and stared for 30 seconds... dude, that's not a cocky pose, that's just standing there and not moving. Since when is being inanimate cool? "fantastic show, brilliant stage, very simple but effective. great lighting. good rock n roll set, turn up the sun makes a wicked opener. wished there was a noel acoustic set, but you can't have everything. the energy outside the stadium after the show was electric..... best f@#$'in band in the world!!!!!!!!!!!! best part was meeting Gem that afternoon on Robson St. though... thanks mate!!!" Oh yah? Well I saw Liam buying hats! Beat that! And by the way dude.... it wasn't a brilliant stage.... simple is not effective... simple is cheap, and you paid $70 a ticket for that. "I liked Noel's comment of "of all the audiences we've played to... you are the most recent." lol. Anyway they were amazing... sounded brilliant, plus I had a good view from the floor. Worth every #### penny folks!!! *I suppose Liam said we were all really nice people when he realized no one was going to throw crap at the stage* Nice one to all the fans for singing along" "Oasis were great, loud anthemic, but for a band that has released as many lp's as they have, could we have a little more content, think that's possible?, to play more then an hour and a half. After seeing Pearl Jam blast through 2 and a half bours of music the week before and then seeing oasis go through the paces with one encore at the end of the show, you kind of get the feeling that they just showed up for the paycheque and did the bare minimum of work for that money, you kind of leave the show feeling a little ripped off, specially when you pay $70.00 for a show. Well if you can't be bothered to put a little effort into it then someone should have corked you in the fucking head with a boot like back in 95'. anyway peace." Amen brother. A band with that many albums SHOULD have a show with "more content". I'll spare you most of the remaining fan reviews, but suffice it to say that they all thought Oasis was the best band ever and that the phrase "best concert I've ever seen" came up frequently. And perhaps that's it... if it was the best concert they've ever seen, I guess they ain't seen too many concerts, have they? Fucking idiots.  Actually, two more fan comments that should be addressed as they relate to what I was saying about Liam standing there like a statue all the time. (And I also have a picture that I stole from a different concert on this tour that I will use to illustrate this...) "did anyone get a photo with liam doing his tambourine balancing act?" "it was great !! funni moment with Liam and his tambourine balancing on his head lol" Yah. Hilarious. That's what passes for showmanship at an Oasis concert, I guess. Get a grip. I suppose in fairness I'd better include some more serious reviews: Please note in this interview that Liam was, in fact, staying at the Four Seasons hotel as I had surmised after seeing him downtown. I quote from the review in the Georgia Strait: Liam's "statuelike poses" I like the review from The Province the best.... read it and see why.  And so another day comes to an end... and for today's last picture I just thought I'd better put together a side-by-side comparison for those sceptics out there who might think that the dude I saw in downtown Vancouver was not, in fact, Liam Gallagher. Good night everyone. Today's Travel Information False Creek Ferries www.granvilleislandferries.bc.ca AquaBus www.aquabus.bc.ca Granville Island www.granvilleisland.com 
|