 And so we begin our last full day in Medicine Hat. It will be a busy one with shopping and zipping around to do stuff with my mom, which is always stressful. I wasn't sure how to start today's travelogue off, so I thought that I would use this satellite image of Medicine Hat. It's at an angle, so don't get fooled by the perspective and exaggerated elevations of the river valley. You can see the various agricultural things going on as well as a closer view of some of those weird green irrigation circles. Once again, this is a very dry part of the world so many crops require irrigating using this long sprinkler systems that rotate around a central fixed point. As they circle around they irrigate a circular pattern, as you can see, leaving the corners dry. But we've got lots of land, so it's okay. And, for the longest time I couldn't think of what the giant whitish-silver patch at the centre of this picture was. I have decided that it must be steam from the cooling towers of the Methanol plant that is located up there. It can't be anything else since there ain't nothing up there that is that big and white.  11:46:45 My mom works her annual office thing job here in the Medicine Hat Lodge and so I am sitting around in the oversized chairs waiting for her to be ready to go shopping with us.  11:48:46 This is the Medicine Hat Lodge's waterslides. There's no wave pool like the Lethbridge Ramada, but it's still fun. I plan to do some sliding later tonight. You see, the trick is to stay here on a weeknight when there's no one else here. That way you get the pool to yourself, which is always good when you are the type of person who don't look so great in a Speedo, if you know what I mean.  12:55:06 And so begins the mad dash of shopping. My mom doesn't like to fool around and can do more purchasing for me in the space of an hour than you would think possible. At the far left is Mark's Work Wearhouse, which is where virtually all my clothing comes from (which might explain my distinct lack of cool). This is a recent development in my life as I used to get all my clothes from cool places and was a lot better dressed. But at some point I decided that white Italian suits were just not practical and that un-black t-shirts were and switched over to that instead. This was interrupted by a brief stretch where I got all my clothes tailor-made and was semi-cool in those days, but I guess I am just too pragmatic. I was walking around in fear of accidentally ruining my clothes and decided that when all you wear is affordable black t-shirts you can live life a lot more freely than you would be able to otherwise. And so I chose freedom and durability over cool.  12:58:51 Oh! Staples! Damm! No time to go there! Too bad. I like Staples.  13:01:09 I direct your attention to the sign at the right which reads "Kalan Rulez!". To this I can only say one thing... get a life Medicine Hat. Let it go. For those who remember last year you will remember that Kalan Porter was in the finals of the Canadian Idol contest. For whatever that might be worth, the citizens of Medicine Hat were very excited about this and the place was covered with "Go Kalan!" stuff last year and for perhaps the only time in history I found myself in agreement with the dorky Medicine Hat skater punks and pothead dorks who surely were slagging on Kalan as they failed to successfully complete a single skateboard trick or smoked way too much pot than is cool. It's Canadian Idol for god's sake. Get a grip. I might also have pointed out that Kalan actually wasn't from Medicine Hat and was, in fact, from a small town to the East. Well anyway, Kalan eventually won the Canadian Idol, which is, of course, artificial stardom and so I guess Kalan now has whatever comes with winning any Idol contest in any country, except on a Canada (read as: smaller) scale. And so, here we are a year later and there's still these stupid signs around. Further to my point that Kalan wasn't even actually from Medicine Hat (don't believe the "Home of Kalan Porter" signs at the city limits!) I might also point out that when Medicine Hatter Richard Taylor won the Nobel Prize for Physics there wasn't a whole lot of interest around town. I can't recall any "Go Richard!" or "Richard Rulez!" signs. Anyway, it's over. Let it go. Kalan does not "rule", I assure you. You know who "rulez"? How about Coldplay? Despite the fact that Chris Martin can't sing and their producers are crap, they are still a pretty great band who didn't climb to staggeringly enormous success singing other people's songs on televisions show. But that's just a thought though, with a twist of musical elitism. Maybe you Medicine Hatters should consider being your own selves and stop attaching such significance to the fleeting successes of others who peripherally have anything to do with having set foot in your town? How about Terri Clark? She's pretty successful and talented. She's also actually from Medicine Hat. Oh sigh... it's pointless. This is just how Medicine Hat is and how it always has been. Even back in the 19th century they were like this. One time Rudyard Kipling visited the few buildings that formed the town for like an hour and ever since then you'd think that the guy lived here or something. There's streets named after him, books quoting his description of Medicine Hat as "all hell for a basement" as their title, and so on. Get a grip Hatters!  Ok. Let's get down to some serious shopping here. I'd better get Line her iPod before I forget. I decided to buy her iPod at Future Shop, a store once known for annoying salespeople on commission who constantly pressured people to buy bigger, better, and more expensive things than they actually needed. I was therefore shocked when the Future Shop salesdude questioned whether I really wanted to buy a 60GB iPod Colour. Did I really need all of that? Maybe a smaller one would be a better choice? Uhhhhhh.... (stunned silence) Yah, I'm sure I want the 60GB. Just turn the key and get it out for me, ok? And don't try to sell me the extended service package. I'm from Europe and the iPod isn't for me anyway. What? Maybe there are places in Holland to send the iPod in for Future Shop servicing? Another typical Medicine Hat attitude. There are no Future Shops in Holland, I promise. Give me the fucking thing and let me leave please.  Buying sandals and stuff is a bit easier. No one at the Shoe Warehouse or Sport Chek tries to sell me any useless extra stuff when I pick out my sandals. In fact, the Sport Chek chick is quite helpful and actually finds me last year's model of Nike sandals that are identical to the ones I am currently wearing, except that they are blue and not black. Hmmmm. I think I would have preferred more black sandals, but they didn't have any that I liked. I will look like an extra doofus going to work at the UN in blue sandals. Bah! Who cares? There's no dress code in the Staff Rules. If they can keep me as a G4 for six years then I can wear sandals to work. Promote me to the G6 level I should be at and give me back pay for 5 years a six months to cover the G6 work I did already and I'll be happy to wear some proper shoes.  15:09:44 After shopping it's off to meet my sister and her kids for some reason. My sister's son shows us the map of Alberta his class made using modelling clay. The blue and green represent the Rocky Mountains, where we actually were a few days ago.  15:15:36 I think I pointed this out last year, but these old schools used to have separate entrances for girls and boys on opposite sides of the building. Now, maybe I am just too modern, but isn't this kind of the same type of thing that South Africa used to do?  15:27:25 This is a nice memory... this is the ice rink where I used to play hockey in the winter.  15:32:38 Sigh... I cannot even count how many times I've played on this playground or softball on this field.  15:44:19 I remember why we're here at my sister's. We're picking up everyone to go out for dinner together. Except that my sister's daughter hasn't got home yet. So, in the meantime I go through my old stuff which is stored down in their basement. This is a tape of the album before the last one of mine. This precedes the whole Symon Jerycho thing, as you might have guessed, but the cover art (top-right) is probably familiar to some people as it has somehow become one of the Symon Jerycho symbols. But this was the first time this particular image appeared... well, actually that isn't 100% true because it was on a t-shirt before I decided to use it as the cover of this particular recording of mine. This image was inspired by the first line of Peter Gabriel's Red Rain ("I am standing up at the water's edge in my dream...") and also has connections to China Beach (one of the beaches we visited on Vancouver Island), but I covered all of that last year, so I won't bore you with it again this year. Hmmmmmm. I used to make an album a year, and even my most recent one I finished in 1998 after only 2 years of recording but it sat on a shelf for four years and I didn't press it until 2002. I guess that's what happens when life kicks the crap out of you for seven years. And look where I am now. Maybe that's Karma? Anyway, I always liked the Long Road album even if it was not well received by my few "fans" at the time because it was trying to be too artsy. It was my first album to have the lyrics on the inside of the covers, which was a big step, and as every experience in life is it was a stop on the road to the recordings that I am making nowadays. On my albums I like to leave a little space on the inside liner notes for a final message that I write just before I give the final "ok" to finalise the music and cover artwork before giving the go-ahead to press the album. Looking back on this album now I am struck by the tone of its final message which reads: "Some people in life will tell you 'When you are far above chasing your dreams across the open sky always remember to keep a firm anchor on the ground below so that you can find your way back down to reality'. However, I have always preferred the inverse of this. As you work your way through the tedious duties of life always remember to keep a firm anchor in the stars so that you will find your way back up into your dreams." Compare this to the final message on the inside cover of my last album (and the one immediately following the Long Road): "Awash in the wake of recent events in this life I neither wanted or worked for, I am tempted to say something that I promised myself I would never say. So here I am, seconds away from (painfully?) closing yet another chapter of my life, and once again I don't know what to do. I've just made too many wrong turns and lost too many people along the way. We are all Hamlet, aren't we? I think that this time I will remain silent and look forward instead. I'm still scared, but chapter closed. Tomorrow is a new day." That's quite a change in tone, don't you think? And even when I wrote the latter comment I still had plenty of being kicked around to come. I think if I had to write such a final message today I would be far less inclined to cling to even a tiny semblence of positivity.  15:48:52 I think that what I will do here is something that I probably shouldn't do because I lack proper reproductions of the songs from the Long Road album. But who cares? If anyone thinks it sucks then, oh well. I think much of it sucks too, so they won't be alone. Hopefully I am doing better stuff nowadays and even if not, I am beyond caring at this point in life. Maybe if I wasn't still a G4 I would care more, but as that is not the case I doubt I will ever care again. And so, bearing in mind that the masters for these recordings are in a vault in Canada and that the songs below are from crappy second generation tapes that I played to death in my car over several years.... and also bearing in mind that back then I recorded everything live off-the-floor with no overdubs, so if you'd seen us back then playing live this is exactly what we sounded like... Here, assembled for the first time since you could actually walk into an record store in Southern Alberta and buy one (which many people did) is the entire Long Road album: The Long Road This is not actually what was on the album originally, but I was lucky enough to get a recording of myself so that later in life I could look back and remember that I wasn't always a bitter angry person. Freedom I hate this song. I really really don't like it at all. Why is it the second song on this album? I have no idea. Bad call. I guess at the time it made sense though. Where Did You Go? I don't think I can find the actual version of this song which ultimately made it on the album. I don't think this can possibly be it since I sing like crap in it. Maybe someday I'll get the masters and we'll know for sure? But if you really need a better version, then this one carried over into the Symon Jerycho years so there's a Symon Jerycho version on www.symonjerycho.com which is much better. Into The Silence This is a weird song. Not sure what this is about. It's kind of disposable in the sense that after recording it I promptly forgot about it and don't even remember how to play it at this point. Empire Fire This one is another carry over into the Symon Jerycho days and the same version (but mastered and not from a crappy second-hand old tape) can be found on www.symonjerycho.com. Ships In The Night I always liked this song, somehow. Perhaps (like Into The Silence) it is because I am the only person playing on it and I am an ego-maniac. Drive! I always like to mention that this is take 5 from the day when myself and two other fellows (Matt and Matt) recorded this song. That means that this is the fifth time we played this song together. Excerpt From A Club There was a couple of different versions of this song, but this must be the one I disliked the least. Suicide Scherzo I always kind of liked this song, even though it's not really what you'd call a really great song. The First Time (Groove #4) Back in those days I always put a version of this song on every album. So this is reincarnation #4 of this particular song. Maybe I should do this one again, except with a real piano for once? This Is Not How I Am / The Long Road (Reprise) This pair of songs rounds out the entire album, which was my first concept album in case you didn't notice the "concept" aspect of things. The Long Road as a metaphor for life.... not exactly Pink Floyd's The Wall, but still something. But I make up for that by going completely conceptually overboard on subsequent records.  15:48:52 Continuing down Memory Lane with some more music related stuff I come across my old collection of concert tickets and decide to share a few highlights from over the years. Notice the U2 PopMart Tour, their greatest tour if you ask me. Top-Center I had a ticket for a show in Edmonton that I didn't use (notice that it is UN-TORN) because I got a much better seat in the 4th row (see ticket at top-left). Also notice the ticket for U2 PopMart in Paris at the right side, which was on the day of Princess Diana's funeral. They played MLK for her, and as we drove out of Paris that night we passed by the tunnel where she was killed which was covered in flowers. At left centre we have Neil Young, which I went to just after recording at Abbey Road Studios for the first time. Neil played a 40 minute guitar noise version of Like A Hurricane that left most of the audience wondering what the hell he was doing. At centre we have Elton John / Billy Joel Face-to-Face in SkyDome in Toronto, which was unbelievable. First they'd play some songs together, then Elton played a whole set, then a couple more songs together, then Billy played a whole set, and then they finished with a few more songs together. I was in tears during Can You Feel The Love tonight, from the Lion King... which Elton had won an Oscar for two days earlier, and which he brought with him that night. At bottom left we have Rush in Vancouver, for which I had (read closely) front row seats. This is when I discovered the band Primus, who were weird and awesome. And finally at bottom centre we have an oldie.... Mr Mister in the Lethbridge Sportsplex.  15:50:02 Another round of tickets, are you ready?!? At top left we have The Nylons, who I have seen more times and in more venues and in more countries than any other performers. They are unbelievable. At top centre we have Bryan Adams, notice the front row seats for that one. I felt bad since I wasn't really a Bryan Adams fan though. At top right is INXS with Michael Hutchence at lead vocals, instead of this new weenie guy. At centre left we have yet another U2 PopMart ticket, this time from Vancouver's BC place, bringing the total number of times I saw that concert to three. Next is Chris de Burgh, who also has a ticket at the bottom left as well. I have seen Chris de Burgh more than any other performer excluding The Nylons. Next to Chris de Burgh at centre is Sting, which this particular night was amazing, but not because of Sting, but because of the drive home afterward. It's all in my book, but for once I'll spare you. I would give almost anything to have this night back. At centre right we have Paul Simon and my wonderful 6th row seats for that show. At bottom right we have Billy Joel. This was, I believe, Landon's first concert. He was really charged up about it when it was over, I remember. "Don't take any shit from anyone," Billy says at the end of the show. And finally, the reason I took all these photos.... bottom centre.... New Kids On The Block. Just in case people really didn't believe that I'd seen them. Well, maybe they just didn't WANT to believe it.  15:50:44 One final memory before we head out for dinner... my old baseball glove. (I am getting teary just thinking about it...)  15:57:34 Here we have a few pictures of the semi-cute dog next door.  15:57:37  15:58:42  16:03:39 Ok! Off to dinner we go! This bridge often freaks people out because it is so narrow. But I have to admit that in pictures it doesn't look as narrow as in real life.  16:10:26 Here's how we know that we're in Alberta... check out the monster behind us.  18:42:39 Dinner tonight is at one of my all-time favourite places... Bonanza and their Freshtastic Food Bar!  18:46:58 Oh man.... how awesome is that? I even got perogies!  22:35:29 After dinner a lot of time is spent rushing around and trying to copy photos from memory sticks to my mom's computer... only to find out that she can't burn CDs. Dammit! Well, back to the hotel then. Tomorrow we leave Medicine Hat behind us and enter the final phase of our trip. Today's Travel Information Bonanza Family Restaurant 3010 Dunmore Road SE Medicine Hat, AB T1B 2X2 (403) 526-9633 Medicine Hat Lodge www.medhatlodge.com 1051 Ross Glen Drive SE Medicine Hat, Alberta T1B 3T8 (403) 529-2222 / 1-800-661-8095 Price with Mom Discount = $0,00 
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